Watch this if you constantly worry | Finding Freedom Podcast

Introduction and Amra's Background

00:00Hi, this is Peter Cone and you're listening to finding freedom. In this episode, which is a big wow. I just worked with Amra and I feel this is going to touch the lives of millions of people because really she's speaking from what I consider to be the default 1.0 mindset of humans, which is to be living in fear and suffering. And she had very good reason to. born in Bosnia, lived through the war as a little girl, and unbeknownst to herself for three and a half decades, has still been living in war, but just inside of her nervous system. If you in any way are holding on to a history that still leaves you feeling scared and sometimes in terror, this episode is for you. I hope you get to discover what she got to discover.

00:44for a world of complete freedom, love, pure possibility, and absolute joy on the other side of the limits that have been defining you. Welcome to 2.0 world. Welcome to finding freedom. >> And I did see you in London. I came to event in London. >> Did you enjoy that? >> Oh, that was so amazing. the energy like what I enjoy what I realized after the event finished is that the the collective energy in the room is just unbelievable. >> So are you based in the UK then? >> No, no, no, no. I'm based in Romania. >> Okay. >> I live in Romania at the moment with my husband and my son. He's 12. >> Yeah. >> Uh he better not hear me. I say that he's 12. He's turning 13. >> Oh, okay. It's important for him.

01:33>> It's very important. It's a big deal. Uh, but originally I'm from Bosnia. I'm from SO. >> Okay. So, you submitted a video saying that you really struggle with fear, which is okay. That's fine. Um, but it it plagues your life in terms of checking the doors and not being able to do things. Like, explain a little bit more of how it sort of seems to have control over your life. >> It's just overwhelming. Paralyzing is the word. Like how many times can you go out of the house >> and check the stove? Like I even tell myself for example like you switched it off, do not come back, you know, and I just keep on coming back. Um the doors at night um the fear that somebody will come in and the fears go like take my

How Fear Controls Amra's Life

02:24child away. um all these kind of crazy I thought I was watching too many movies but then I realized that actually when I I did a lot of work over the years my life was kind of like a movie you know I live some of the things that were in a movie so I guess when now the life is kind of stressful I guess the old things and patterns come back so it's just paralyzing I would have a simple thing to do for example I don't know write an email, a simple email. I would procrastinate. I would freeze. I would stay for hours just not doing that. >> It's I don't know. The word is paralyzing. I think I like Yeah, >> I get it. It's okay. It's okay. So, you're in a safe space. I have no doubt that we're going to be able to get

03:16beyond this. Uh and I can probably make some pretty accurate guesses as to where it came from, but I'd like to hear from you. um especially given where you grew up and your background. So >> I even wrote if I sorry to interrupt like I even wrote if I get to freeze I wrote do not skip these words you know just say them out so I'll just keep them here you know just >> fine no you you're well prepared I'm I I appreciate that both for yourself for your own comfort and also to help me help you. Um, so tell me, so tell me about your upbringing, your childhood. I can guess some of it based on where you grew up, but as you've heard me say, past hurt informs future fear, right? So typically the things that we're scared

Amra's War Story

04:03of and fear is as a byproduct of the way that we have experienced life as a child, the things that we went through. So I'm sure you've got plenty to share. I was listening some of your podcasts before I got to talk to you and um you was saying something about stories that we just make them up and I was like will I share my story because then in the background I feel like cuz you were talking something about victimhood and stuff and that's why for many many many years I didn't choose to share my story because there are so many people that had it worse than me >> but it was very overwhelming. Um I was 11 or 11 and a half when the war started in Bosnia. >> Yeah. >> And it really came by this like

04:51surprise. It was overnight. On Friday I went to school and on Monday all the shops were robbed. My brother's best friend would sniper in our living room. So it was just >> just very very overwhelming. And as a child probably I didn't have a capacity to actually understand what was happening which was a good thing in a way. But then as I grew up and I became aware of certain things and I matured, I actually realized and I kept on going back and back and back and back to the to to the story. >> Um I did have a lot of therapy to try to understand what happened and try to understand that this is past but I never ever managed to to accept it, acknowledged it and just move on. That's what I That's what I realized. We were

05:45in a war for maybe a year and then because my grandparents and my brother were in the other city, that city got occupied, we didn't have communications with them. >> Yeah. >> So, we didn't know if they were living or not living. So, when we realized we got a red cross letter that they kind of alive, then we wanted to get out uh from the city. And by that time, at the end of the 92, not a fly could get out except special convoys. And my dad stayed cuz he was military capable. So, he couldn't leave. >> Mhm. >> And he didn't even want to leave. And then my mom and I decided to leave. And um so we did, but we couldn't get out as ourselves. So, we had to have fake IDs. >> Mhm. and completely like new identities

06:36and stuff and go through enemies lines and snipers and all that stuff. So yeah, it was needless to say complicated. >> Yeah, it's okay. I mean, the word that comes to mind, especially through the eyes and senses of a child, is it's terrifying. You know, that's what I still feel is in your nervous system is absolute terror. Right. >> Absolutely. And that actually started coming up when I had my child. >> Mhm. >> And as Alex was growing up and he started asking questions. Um my mom unfortunately passed away two and a half years ago. I'll also get to that. But he was very connected to my mom and we we visited a lot of times. So we never discussed we're not a family who kind of discusses these kind of heavy heavy

07:30things. We never did. So I didn't explicitly >> sit him down and say this is what happened. But he's a very smart uh kid and as he was growing up and asking questions. I was telling him few things of course modified versions of it what he could um handle. But as he was getting to the age that I was when that happened, which is kind of around this time, these fears just came back like I was >> Mhm. >> just teleported back to the time and yeah, I tried journaling, I tried therapy, I tried name it, I think. >> Yeah, >> I I tried it, but it's just coming back. writing, journaling did hap did um help in a way because I kind of left it on a paper. I said some things that I was kind of never allowed or they were not

08:24politically correct to say. >> Okay. >> So I just like wrote it down and then at least it felt like somebody heard. >> Yeah. >> You know, so kind of that helped a bit. >> Yeah. No, I get it. It's okay. Like all of us, whatever it is that we go through, your nervous system is going to react and respond according to the circumstance. Right? The thing is now how you're um how old are you now? 40 >> 456 in my son's >> in my son's language. Yeah. >> Yeah. Almost 4. Yeah. For him, he's almost 13. Almost >> almost. >> Yeah. Exactly. Okay. So, 45 almost 46. So the things that you went through obviously are predominantly you know um about 30 plus years ago right when >> I'm carrying that I'm carrying that

Making Space for the Scared Little Girl

09:15stuff for 30 years I mean >> sorry yeah >> yeah it's okay it's okay so the first thing I want you to do is just be okay with it right meaning like because what I hear is one there's the discomfort of having the fear that's not fun as you said having to go back can check the stove five or six times and all the other things that drive you almost like an OCD kind of behavior, right? But the other thing is you then got resistance to it. You've got judgment of yourself for it, right? >> Yeah. >> So you got to understand, so if your son right now like was in any kind of scary situation, god forbid a war, and he was terrified, would you judge him for it? >> No way. No way. You love him. And Right. So that's our first access, Amra, is to

10:09start to see, oh, hang on a minute. Your nervous system is still being dictated and run by a scared little girl, and then you're making her wrong for that, >> right? >> You see that? So imagine you had a little cute little adorable daughter who's going through this terrifying war and you're saying no, you shouldn't have this or you're being judgmental of her for feeling scared. You wouldn't do that, would you? >> No way. >> So if you could just feel that first of all, how does that hit your body? If you could just allow knowing that your nervous system There you go. That's a little softer breath, right? Uh how would that feel? If you could just say for now at least it's okay. It's okay that you still got all of this

10:57terror in your system. >> Yeah. It's so hard for me not to judge myself. I'm so okay of not judging others and giving space to them. I love doing that. But when it comes to me, I'm like >> Yeah. But it feels very nice. >> Yeah. Okay. Good. There we go. >> Yeah. >> Softer, right? >> Softer. Yeah. It's like I see you type of a thing. >> Like I see you and it's okay for you to be scared. >> There you go. There you go. Like I use many terms and expressions and quotes as you know and I say the ego which is really what we're dealing with here doesn't want to be healed. It wants to be held. So I want you to consider your first barrier to freedom has been not the fear itself but it's that you've been trying to get

11:48rid of it. Right. >> Yeah. >> Which I know seems counterintuitive because you're like, "Well, yeah, duh. I want to get rid of it." Yes. But >> funny enough, >> sorry. Funny enough, I keep on telling my son when he gets scared. I keep on telling him, "Alex, it's okay. We just need to learn how to be comfortable in discomfort and it will pass." >> So, >> yeah. >> Okay. >> Yes. So you're teaching the right things but it's easy as you said to see things in others or hold space for others and maybe not so much for ourselves. So first of all it's okay. So just notice fear is there right? Fear comes up and quite regularly for you. >> Yeah. >> For now just with me can you just now I'm not saying we want it to stay but

12:40can you be okay with that? That sometimes Amra gets scared. >> Sure. >> Yeah. It's called being human, right? And especially given your background as a child growing up in a war zone, that's pretty damn scary. >> Yeah. >> So, if we can start to locate that and feel in your body, if you could just with me make space for whatever it is you experience, in this case, you know, terror, fear, panic, can you see that that allows your body just to soften it a little bit? >> Yeah. I still feel it, but the body is like, "It's okay. It's okay." >> It's okay, isn't it? >> Well, let me see. What's What's one of the most joyous things about your son? Is it when he gets up in the morning and you see his cute little face?

The Full Spectrum of Human Emotion

13:33>> Oh my god, you read my mind. Yes. When he when he wakes up in the morning and the first morning cuddles, it's just nothing replaces that. So, first of all, reading minds is part of my occupation, but secondly, yes, it sounds it sounds delightful. So, when you have your morning cuddles with him, are you trying to get rid of that sensation that you have with him? >> Oh, no. I'm like absorbing it. It's like >> my I'm there. I'm really there. fully present, enjoying every moment, savoring it, right? >> Yeah. >> Yeah. I can see it can almost bring you to tears. So now listen, on the spectrum of what it is to be a human, Amra, we go from all the way out to hopefully bliss and this divine experience of love and

14:28connection, intimacy, affinity that you experience with your son in the morning cuddles. That's one end of the spectrum. And the other end of the spectrum, we could call absolute panic and terror, dread. But here's the thing. They all belong to the human scale of emotion. And what you're saying is, I just want the good stuff. I don't want the other stuff. >> I think I'm saying I can't handle other stuff. >> I know. I know. But why is that a lie? Why is it a lie that you can't handle it? >> Cuz I handled so much. >> Yeah, you're here. You handled way more as a child. Like now you're in Romania. You're in your home. You're not in war zones. You're not having to make fake IDs to get past enemy lines. You know,

15:24the worst thing you have to do is go back in the house and see if the stove is still on. >> It's not It's not that tragic, right? >> Yeah. Correct. I see what you mean. Like on a conscious level, I see it. And when you say it like that, it sounds >> funny. Um >> I like to bring as much comedy to my work as possible. Yes. >> Yeah. It just it's funny. Um but yeah, but yet here we are. >> No, I know you're doing great. Just stick with me. I work in mysterious ways. Okay. So, like you're already starting to feel soft. I'm explaining to you. Yes. Consciously, logically, you understand. Oh, hang on a minute. I'm human. As a human, I have the gamut of of emotions. Meaning, I have the full spectrum of feelings available to me.

16:11And I would assert that's part of the joy of being human. Part of the joy of being human is that we get to feel anything. Just that we get to feel. You're alive. Think about it this way. If you now as a welly, you know, aabled human, as a woman, if one of your arms, let's say your dominant arm, your right arm, was always numb. You couldn't feel it. You didn't even know if you had one. Would that be a fun way to go around your life? >> No. >> No. So, it's there, but it's numb, right? You don't want to feel it. So, consider that anatomically as the equivalent of your emotions. You're saying, "Well, my emotions are fear and terror there, but I don't want to feel them." It's like you're trying to cut

16:55them off, >> right? Okay. >> Do you see? >> Yeah. >> You're starting to become more expansive, right? You're making space. >> Yeah. I'm not allowing them. >> Pardon? >> I'm not allowing them. >> Yes. And >> I'm just saying I just want these. I don't want those. >> Exactly. And right now, what you just said with that big exhale is such a gift to yourself and everyone listening. Cuz I promise you, everyone listening does the same. They don't want to feel bad. They don't want to feel scared. They don't want to feel ugly. They don't want to feel tired. They don't want to feel any of the negative stuff, but yeah, give me more of the positive stuff. Here's the rub. Human existence doesn't work like that. So you, what you just

17:44said was so accurate. You don't want to feel in this case the fear and the terror. I want you to consider Amra, it's not the fear and the terror that are bothering you. It's your resistance to them that is creating the suffering. And say that again. It's not the fear that is bothering you. It's the fact that you don't want to have it. >> I get it. >> And what I'm saying is it's not that you can't handle the fear. You're a big enough human being that you can handle all of it. That's how you're actually designed to have those feelings. And here's the beautiful thing. As soon as, now listen, as soon as you make space for the fear and the terror, what do you think happens to the fear and the terror?

Possibility Versus Probability

18:33>> Yeah. They just have their voice and then they just go. >> They go. They're just It's just look at it this way. If you were in your house as you are, but let's say you're in the kitchen and your son comes in and he wants mommy's attention cuz he loves mommy, right? And he's like dragging uh your pants, pulling your, you know, your skirt like mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy. And you keep ignoring him. Not only do you keep ignoring him, you keep pushing him away. >> Yikes. He keeps on coming back. I promise you. >> I promise you. Just like your fear and terror. Correct? >> Because what does he want? >> He wants to be held. He wants attention. He wants that hug. >> And so, listen, my dear, that's all your

19:21fear and terror are asking for. >> Oh, yeah. We're getting different respiratory patterns already. Can you feel that? >> Yeah. >> Your fear is not a problem. It's asking to be integrated as part of your experience. That little girl, I don't say this to be melodramatic, but that little girl is still there in Bosnia. She's scared. She's asking for you to pick her up and say, "I've got you." >> Every time I land there, every time I land that airport, like it's like the only way I can feel joy when I'm there is through my son's eyes because he's so excited for some reason. Actually now when you explained what you explained I think he's teaching me a lot of things but the joy that he has when he lands

20:12there you know the food um his pies his coffee places like he completely designed the ecosystem when he's there and he thoroughly enjoys it and he's very he's very sensitive in a sense that he's an empath. >> Yeah. >> Wonder why. But anyways, he's an empath. So, he does understand what happened there. He would feel um some heaviness, but for him, it's like he knows how to process it. He's like, I acknowledge it, but I'm still able to enjoy this place. >> Yeah. >> And I'm like, let's get out of here. But then because he wants it, he wants to enjoy so badly, then I just get carried away with his joy. So I'm just >> joyful with him when we are there. >> I love it. And there's no doubt that he and you have a soul contract so that

21:10he's here to help you just as you are to help him. But so I want you to be able to see the distinction between the wise, right? So meaning why does he have that experience versus yours? And there's two words. He looks through the eyes of possibility. It's all possible. It's pure joy, pure excitement. You're looking through the eyes of probability. You see the difference? Your your current nervous system is wired. It's not accurate, but it is understandable for which we have compassion. You're looking through the eyes of probability, meaning what's probable to your nervous system that might happen. >> Correct? which is just an extension of a history that's got nothing to do with today. So, number one, we want to make

22:00space for that scared little girl. We love her. She's terrified and she's asking for you to include her. Right. You You just became a mother of two. Is that all right? >> It's okay. I always wanted a little girl also. >> Well, she's there right there with you. >> There we go. >> She's just been asking to be included. You've just been pushing her away for 30 something years, right? >> I'm sorry. Yeah, >> it's okay. Yeah, she's adorable. She's just really terrified. So, that's number one. We're not trying to get rid of it, which is all you've been doing for three and a half decades. We're actually saying, "No, there's space for you. You can come with us. I've got you. You're in a safe space now." Right? Do you feel

22:38the difference? It's completely the opposite. One is denial, dismissal, saying, "I'm you're not wanted here." And the other is like, "You're so wanted here. I love you." >> Okay. Number one. >> Number two, we now want to understand the mechanics of the probability mindset you're looking through. So, what did that little girl learn about the future? How is she oriented? What is the way that she perceives what might happen? >> That she will definitely not be okay. >> Definitely not be okay. Right? That's the way that she relates to herself, which is terror. So you may have heard me use that as one of the primal prisons, right? There's these 10 prisons that we all have. And the default one that humans have as it relates to the

23:27future is looking through a lens. It's not a truth. You're looking through a lens that I'm not going to be okay. So now I want you to consider that that little girl that Friday she came home and war was on Sunday. Like literally boom, just happened. Of course, it makes total sense that she's going to fear not being okay. Do you see that? >> Yeah. And it it's like I'm always expecting something to happen. >> Oh, that I understand. That's the other part. That's the probability, right? I said, what your eyes of your son, he's looking through the lens of what? >> Uh possibility. >> And you're looking through the lens of >> probability. That's the expectation, right? He doesn't have a future. And so, he is

24:18purely curious, which is the nature of consciousness itself. We're here to explore our own potentiality and the experience of what it is to be a human. That is actually a joyous adventure. It's exploration. He's exploring. You're seeking. But what you're seeking for is evidence for your nervous system to be right. that there's reason for you to be scared. Do you see the difference? What is the truth, Armor, about the future in terms of what you know? Do you absolutely >> have no clue? >> You're [ __ ] clueless. Right. Right. No clue. Now, let's use that logic and integrate it because your nervous system thinks it knows what's going to happen and it's clearly not going to be good. Do you see? >> Yeah.

25:06>> He's 12. He's a kid. He doesn't have enough experience to worry about the future yet. Okay, we could argue, of course, you were 11, you know, so things can happen to children who are much younger and they start to develop a relationship to the future of fear. He's clearly not there, which speaks volumes about you as a mom and the space you've created for him >> to keep him open and allow him to be in curiosity, exploration, adventure, right? Pure possibility. Now, that is where your little girl started. So, we just want to let her know it's okay to go back there, right? We just want to do it very carefully. So, yes, you're looking through the lens of you're not going to be okay. How do we know that? That view that

25:49you're not going to be okay is also a lie.

Imagination as a Skill

26:01>> It's been there for 30 something years. 34 years. I'm here. I mean, I always thought I would not be okay and I'm here talking to you. >> You made it. It's pretty good evidence, right? So, so you got to start. This is where it becomes comedic, right? You got three and a half decades with all the love and compassion and understanding of why looking through a lens that you're not going to be okay. And yet here you sit with a beautiful son, a husband who apparently loves you, and the opportunity to break free talking to Peter Cone. Not only are you not not going to be okay, life seems pretty damn good. Honestly, >> I hit a jackpot. >> You hit the [ __ ] jackpot, right? So, you might want to start to

26:47realize that your view of life isn't that accurate. >> Correct. >> Okay. So, let's do number one. And you know, you may have heard me or seen me do this exercise before, but if I were to cut you open, Amra, am I going to find a physical manufacturing label made of wood, metal, plastic inside of you, says Amra, born in Bosnia, she's not going to be okay? >> No. >> No, I'm not. Right. So, where, cuz it does define you and it causes you to go back in the house three, five, seven times to check the stove or whatever it is. Where does I'm not going to be okay live? >> In my beautiful, beautiful, very stubborn mind. >> Yeah. Very stubborn, very imaginative, very convincing. Yes. Yes. Very realistic mind. And it is

27:37real. But the difference is it's not true. >> Things can. >> Okay. >> Yeah. So if it's just in your mind, I have all the love and compassion. It is a reality. Human beings are defined entirely by their view of life. And to them, their view feels real. >> Yes. >> It's very real. >> But you now at this point, if I was talking to you as a 12y old, it might be much harder because it's very new and you're still in it. But as a 45year-old, soon to be 46, let's keep your son's uh your distinctions of age alive for him. is, you know, it just isn't it just isn't close to a truth anymore. You've got three and a half decades of evidence. Yeah. Notwithstanding the normal things of being human where you stub your toe or god forbid maybe you

28:31did a little light on or you know [ __ ] that we do as humans. But you're going to be okay because we know you are because you're right there in front of me, >> right? >> So if it's just a p perspective, which is all it is, it's just a view. It's a story that you're not going to be okay. Is it an absolute truth that you're not going to be okay? >> No. >> No. Now, stay with me. You're doing great. So, we want to first look at the dissolution of it. I'm not going to say you're going to be okay, but I guarantee you absolutely 100% you're not not going to be okay. You're not not going to be okay. Meaning, we remove it. It's not a truth anymore. It's a lens you've been looking through which was totally appropriate

29:18for the scared little girl but completely inappropriate for a grown woman. So if that's gone just just as best as you can feel into your body you can't anymore look through the lie because that's all it is that you're not going to be okay. How does that feel? What becomes available for you? >> Everything. just waking up in the morning and not being tired of that weight. >> Yeah. >> You know, and I didn't even open my eyes and it's already heavy. >> Yeah. >> Just Yeah. >> Freedom. >> Just even allowing myself to feel the possibility of something being okay. >> Yeah. What would that be like?

30:16I can't describe. It would just be >> like morning snuggles. >> Yeah. No. Yeah, it Yeah. No, I I don't know if it can be that close. Give me a close. >> Close. Very close. >> Yeah. >> Very close. It's just Yeah. I'm very stubborn. I am very >> No, you're not. You're not. Careful. Careful. You're not stubborn. You're freedom looking through a stubborn convincing lens which is not a truth. We don't want to keep reinforcing a lie. You're not stubborn. You are joy. You are freedom. You are love. You are curiosity. You are p pure play. That's your nature. You've become confused with your perspective. Do you see the difference? >> I do. I do. >> So, is it true that you're stubborn? >> No. >> No. >> Which is my lens?

31:23>> Exactly. Now, that we can do something about. See, if you're stubborn, then you wouldn't even have morning snuggles. See, this is where the evidence falls apart. That snuggles that you have with your beautiful son, Alex, has got nothing to do with somebody whose system is really stubborn. You're playful. You're joyous. You're you're laughing. You're crying. You're tickling. You're in heaven. Right. >> Right. >> And that you said you could take more of. Why? Because that's your nature. There's a difference between what is natural and what has become normal for you. It is not natural for somebody to go and check the stove three, five, six times. That's not natural. That's normal because of the lens that you've been

32:08looking through. Do you see the difference? >> Absolutely. >> Good. Because the more you understand it, the more you're going to let go of what has become normal and reside in your natural, which is what >> I will stop judging myself. >> Yeah. Yes. Judging yourself is equally normal. It's very normal. you go out there in the world. I mean, people judge each other themselves all day. That's very normal. It's very ordinary. I'm not interested in that. I'm in or I'm interested in the extraordinary recognizing, oh, I I once was a little girl and her nervous system lives on in me and she's still trying to protect herself, but she doesn't need to. I've got it. It's okay. We're not not going to be okay. And how

32:55do we know that? Because the future's unknown. And that's why through your son's eyes, he's teaching you the joy of the unknown, the pure possibility of uncertainty. But to that little girl, that was terrifying. And we understand the reason. >> Yes. >> Yes. And I want wanted to say when you said that that one of the reasons why I made my video the way I did is that I had this moment of thinking like he just came to me. I was with Alex and I looked at him and he was just so joyous in whatever he was doing and I said like I just don't want cuz he loves me so much and he models me like they learn through like seeing. >> Yeah. And I said, I just want him to continue being that, >> you know, like continuing having that

33:47possibility like >> uh mindset and not go to my former >> Yeah. >> Um >> outlook. >> Yeah. Your old outlook. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Amazing. Well, don't worry because he's obviously a powerful spirit who just loves life and that's why he picked you because think about it. If you want to get strong, you know, you go to the gym and what do you do? If you want to get strong biceps, what do you do? >> You lift weights. >> You lift something heavy, right? You go against the quote unquote what seems to be the resistance. He wants to experience pure joy and possibility. so perfect that he originally picked a mom who was stuck in probability and fear. What What a great training ground for

34:37him to go, "Oh, that's not going to bother me. I'm still going to be looking through the eyes of possibility." Isn't that cool? >> That's beyond cool. >> Beyond cool. Yeah. So now we just want to get mom to join him in his game of pure possibility. >> Right? >> Here's here's the irony. Listen to me. All you've been doing is living in the world of possibility. It just your possibility has been very limited to your historical memory. You're still So do you know what's going to happen in the in the future? >> I have no clue. >> No clue. But then it's the energy of possibility that you've been using just in a negative way. Because if you don't know what's going to happen, you're still using possibility, but

There Are No Bad Things, Just Things Happening

35:31you're creating worst case scenarios. >> Oh, I can list you. I I'm an expert in a worst case scenarios. >> Okay. Listen to what you just said. You're an expert. Yeah. But what energy are you using to create that?

35:52I don't know. I don't see it. I don't know. >> Listen, you're you aren't you using your imagination to create >> Oh, definitely. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. >> Well, what is imagination? Possibility.

36:10Don't. And I kept on saying I do not have imagination. I do, but I'm freaking using it for stupid. Anyways, okay. >> Listen, all anyone has is an imagination. I can remember one of my first golfers, we helped triple his winnings. You know, if you're a business and we triple your winnings in a year and a half, that's pretty good, right? >> Yeah. >> He texted me actually within the first couple of months working together. This is before we got to triple, but he started to play incredibly well. And he was like, "Oh my god, I just got it. It just comes down to whoever has the best imagination. >> I didn't even go to that other side of imagination. Like, >> no, but you're still using imagination. So, imagine, okay, so now I'm going to

37:00allow you for a second to be stubborn with me. >> But your stubbornness is how incredibly attached you are to amazing imagined futures. That's how stubborn you are. >> The things I could do. >> The things I could do. >> I know. If you can talk yourself into walking in and out of a freaking house when you probably have way more important things to do just to check the stove. Imagine what you could have do when you apply that imagination to something you're actually committed to. >> Oh my god. >> It's crazy, isn't it? That's how powerful you are, Amra. Humans. Humans. >> Isn't it beautiful though to see? >> See, you never had a problem. You actually have a skill. It's just your skill was oriented towards something

37:55that's very understandable, which is still that little girl's memory that she's not going to be okay. But you've got three and a half decades to show that your perceived reality is so inaccurate. >> Right. I guess I like being so right, you know? So I'm just Yeah. >> Yeah. But you're so wrong because even you like you're so committed to being right and you're still wrong. So you kind of suck at that. Yeah. >> Right. >> I guess I'm starting to be okay with to suck in things. So, it's okay. Yes. I >> I suck at that of being right. >> Yeah. Yeah. And we have all the love and compassion because it's that little girl who's still trying to run a 45year-old woman's life, which is adorable, but it's it's completely powerless. It's

38:55completely ineffective. >> Absolutely. >> Yeah. How did we turn something into what I thought? How did you turn something into what I thought? It'll be a tragic conversation in which I will not be able to like say anything into pure comedy. You're so talented. >> Well, thank you. That's what I do. I'm I'm just revealing the truth. >> Yeah. Okay. >> You've been living in a in a charade. You've been living in this this lie, this illusion of doom, not realizing you're using the very same skills that I use, that I help the best, most incredible performers around the world to use the same faculty of imagination and possibility, but to create the things they want. Now, you've got the most amazing abilities. You've

39:50just been using them for your own detriment. >> So, the good news, >> yeah, wonderful news. Well, the good news is with modern technology, you've probably got at least another 45 years to go, you know. So, imagine what you can create. Imagine what kind of mom Alex now gets. >> The one he knows is there. Cuz this kid, >> he told me yesterday we went to buy some stuff for school and he goes, I was telling him like I think he's the only person that I said that I will do the podcast and I was discussing. He's like, "Mom, why are you absent? What's going on?" And I said, "Well, I'm a bit nervous." He said, "About what?" I said, "About podcast." He said, "Why?" I said, "I don't know, Alex. I'm just

40:38nervous." And he said, "You're good at that stuff. You like talking about that stuff, right?" And I'm like, "Yeah." So, I was trying to explain something to him. And he goes, "So what you're telling me actually is what I'm hearing from you is that you're afraid to be happy." >> Mhm. >> And I said, "What do you mean, Alex?" He says to me, "So you're kind of thinking if we are having fun that you can't have fun because something bad will happen >> if you have fun. I was like, "Yeah, this kid is just >> he's got your number. >> Not anymore. He's going to be like, "Whoa, who are you? Where's my mom?" You're like, "I'm right here, fool. Let's go. Let's go have some fun." Right. >> Yeah. >> So, that's one part of it, right? So, is

41:37it an absolute truth that you're not going to be okay? >> No. >> No. that was completely made up by your own nervous system for which we understand and have compassion. But let's stop living in this fictitious worst case scenario. Okay. >> Okay. >> Cuz you've got four and a half decades now even through war of realizing the story that you're not going to be okay just really doesn't hold anymore. >> Right. No. >> Okay. So that's that's one part. Now the other part which you just sort of perhaps not coincidentally just said is what you think is going to happen. How how do you delineate what you think is going to happen? It's going to be >> it's going to be bad. >> Exactly. So again, so remember every

42:30human being is fundamentally using their imagination as a continuation of a history that has not yet been accepted. The imagination is used typically to perpetuate worst case scenarios, right? Especially if you've had a bad like if someone's been in war like you, of course, then it's like you're going to be looking out for war. If someone has been sadly hit or abused, they're going to be looking for being hit and abused, right? That's the way that the brain, which is designed to predict and protect, tries to keep you alive. But all it's actually doing is keeping your memory alive. Isn't that nuts? So is it true that you're not going to be okay? >> No. >> And then as you relate to the future, you think what type of things are going

43:18to happen? >> Bad. Bad things are going to happen. Right? So now let's just look at that. If you walk around thinking bad things are going to happen, how does that leave you feeling? >> Scared, anxious. >> Yeah. And then you're And then the way that you adapt and cope is what? >> Hide. >> Hide. Control. Try to figure out >> Yeah. >> A lot of control, right? >> A lot of control. Absolutely. >> Okay. So, >> letting go is not my my gem. >> No, it's exhausting. That's why you wake up in the morning, you're tired before you've even opened your eyes. Your nervous system is already oriented to looking out for worst case scenarios before anything's even happened. And also it hasn't even had time to reconcile the the litany of like past

44:11days, weeks, months, and years that it's been in that state. It's just like constantly in fight or flight. Right. >> Absolutely. >> So do you know that bad things are going to happen categorically? >> No. >> No. I know it's a big one for you. So listen, I'm going to take you even deeper. Okay. >> Would you say that this conversation you're having with me right now is powerful? >> Very much so. >> Would you say that this conversation right now is and will change the course of your life? >> Absolutely. >> Would you say that this conversation you're having with right now makes you a much better mom for your beautiful son? >> Endlessly. Now, could all of that have happened, meaning those three things I just said

45:04about, you know, better changing your life, better mom, you know, this is powerful. Could that have happened if it weren't for what that little girl went through? Gotcha. Got him. >> No. >> No. So therefore, was it bad? >> No. But it was scary. It's okay. It was really scary. But it was also part of your journey. It was part of your karma to go through that so that you right now with me get the living opportunity to step into the most extraordinary, joyous, fun, loving, happy mother. Not just for yourself, but for that beautiful boy. And you wouldn't have known how to access this if it was all worth it. I would go I would go through it all again. >> I know. And that's how we sign up for this incarnation.

The 2.0 World and Closing

46:05You don't remember these deals that you made, but you're here because you want to experience this level of joy. And the only way you can really access this joy is if you know you know that you can handle the worst because you already did. So, I'm going to phrase something for you that I really want you to understand. There's no such thing as bad things happening. There's just things happening. >> Yeah. >> We put good, bad, right, wrong on top of life. But what I want you to understand, Amra, is there's nothing you can't handle. So, it's never bad. Are things going to happen in the future? Yes. That's all that ever is going to happen. Things happening. you thinking they're bad, you labeling them, perceiving them, imagining them as

46:54bad is what changes your state. But what would it be like for you as a woman, as a mother, as a 45year-old being now who can look through the lens of, "Yeah, things are going to happen and guess what? I'll deal with it." That's my dream. I don't know what other people are dreaming of. their cars, their apartments, their whatever. Man, they like they because my husband is into completely different things. But anyways, like that's my dream. Like honestly with 1,000% is just not to see everything as tragedy. like the nervous system not to be so wired that every single little thing >> is like overwhelm. It's >> because it's not on the level of the being that you are from the spirit that you see in the pure joy and bliss of

47:58your son even in Bosnia at a coffee shop or whatever like that joy is your nature and then outside of you in the three-dimensional world that we call reality things are just always happening and I'm not saying they're ideal there are some what seem to be horrific things that happen to humans you know really on the on the scale of what can happen there's a lot. But there's also an immense amount of bliss and joy and good fortune. It's all just things happening. And I'm telling you, reminding you that there's nothing you can't handle. So then why would you have this tendency to constantly look for the bad? Because you think they're bad. No, it's just things happening. >> Yeah. Do you see that's an entirely different

48:48world to live in? >> Completely. >> And what comes to my mind when you say that is that I wouldn't call this similar. Alex and I are separate people from what and separate relationship to what my mom had with me. >> Mhm. >> But I looked the way she lived. >> Mhm. for a very very very long time cuz she was my >> mother and father. So for better for worse she did I know she did the best she could. >> Yeah >> but there was a lot of suffering. So now when you saying this previous uh previous thing I just my mom is popping in my head >> and she suffered a lot. So I guess from very early age I thought that that's that's the default state because that's how you live. >> Well, here's here's the sad part. That

49:46is the default state of most humans. Even in the you know religion of Buddhism, they say one of the noble truths to be human is to suffer. But that's why when you very kindly earlier gave me the compliment of like the talent I have to turn tragedy into comedy, you know, to turn grief into gratitude, which is what I do, is because that's called my 2.0 world. I'm showing you the truth. Humans are stuck in the illusion of all their suffering and their fear, the limitation of their subconscious, which creates all of their disease and their scarcity, which is suffering, but it's all made up. 2.0 in our world is this new space for humans to live in freedom, love, possibility, vitality, joy and abundance.

50:31>> But why we are not scared? So this is what what bugs me like now when you say it. So why am I scared of s why am I not scared of suffering? So I'm okay with suffering but I'm afraid to be in the unknown that brings possibility. Like how? >> No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Unknown doesn't bring anything. You are wired because of the 1.0 mindset is what I call it. The current default operating system of humanity right now. Everybody out there, all the war, all the tragedy, all the corruption, all the abuse, all the horrific things that we see is because everyone's living on this old operating system. So uncertainty, yes, is pure possibility. It's all possibility. You saw that earlier. It's just the way you're currently wired is

51:21to put worstcase scenarios into uncertainty that creates your suffering. Do you see? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> There's no suffering. People say, "I'm scared of the unknown." No. No one's scared of the unknown >> because it's unknown. How can you be scared of something that you don't know? >> Thank you very much for completing my sentence. >> Yeah. Now you just scared to me. Just it just Yeah. Do you see? It's so obvious once you see it. And yet now why I have compassion and I tell people you can't be held accountable for that which you're oblivious to. Meaning right now there are people drinking, smoking, cheating, you know, lying. Like they're in suffering because they don't know what they don't know. It's not their fault.

52:07But you're waking up to this new 2.0 world. You get to be freedom. You're not just stepping into freedom. You realize I am freedom. >> Yeah. See? Well, there we we we're getting there. >> Um, >> that's never been scared of the unknown. No, you've never been scared of the unknown. Your current wiring, your programming, and your conditioning through no fault of your own is being informed by a terrified little girl. But that has got nothing to do with today or yesterday or last year or last decade. But you were always being informed. That's why I had the quote, "Past hurt informs future fear." But when were you in war? When were you actually in a war zone? >> 30 something years ago, but it continued

53:00like >> No, no, no. I know. So you, the you that I'm talking to right now, was never in a war zone. Ever. Just get that. you right now, not with the same body, the hair, the height, the experience, the talent was never in a water. >> No. >> Do you see? You're just remembering. It's your memory that's upsetting you of a little girl who is still asking to be integrated. That's it. That's it. And you have created war for three and a half decades by yourself. And that's why we have war because again as my quote says, we'll never have peace as long as people are at war within themselves. Yeah, this is powerful stuff. Isn't that crazy? All made up. Amra, that's the good news. Now the opportunity is to realize if you made if

54:13you made up that degree of suffering, tragedy, fear, terror, and war within yourself, imagine what else you can make up. >> Did I say I'm scared to even think what I can make up? >> Yeah. Well, that's just your residual self-image because scared has been what defined you. But actually, it's power. Power is what you're tapping into. The power to be the most extraordinary, liberated, funloving, creative mother, woman, wife.

54:55Okay, that's pretty different, isn't it? Yeah. >> You ready to get busy living? >> I guess so. >> Well, that was convincing. It's okay. You got less than an hour against 35 years. I I I'll give you a little bit of time to figure it out. >> Yeah. Please be kind. Yeah. Um Yeah. >> Is it true that you're not going to be okay? No. >> Is it true that bad things happen? >> No. >> No. What is the truth? >> Things happen. >> Things happen. And sometimes they're not ideal. But guess what? You're equipped apparently to deal with them. >> I can handle them. Apparently. >> Apparently you can. Do you just see how powerful that is? You just went from thinking there's nothing you can handle and there's the boogie monster around every corner to

56:03like it should I feel your whole spine just changing right like this the posture of who you are now as a woman as a mother you know yes your mother was living in suffering because that's how humans are currently conditioned I get it I have compassion I'm sorry that that's what you had to witness and what she went through but you're a different type of human being now you get to show your son, even though he's been the one showing you what it is to live from a world of complete freedom, love, possibility, and power. What a gift to all of you. >> I know it's just now when you're saying that I'm I'm just everything that I ever had in my mind is just stories and stories and they just stories, man. They just

56:50>> I know. Welcome to my world and now why you can see what you call talent and why I'm able to just help people completely free their minds. And that's why I created 2.0 world. There's people just lining up right now to join 2.0 world because these conversations will be happening every day in the community. I'll be doing my monthly calls to help people step into a world of complete freedom. >> It's just Yeah. I did not think this conversation will go this way. >> Like >> I know and that's why I love what I get to do because you can't see beyond the limits of your own current perspective. >> Welcome to a new world, my dear. Completely mindblowing. >> Yeah, >> it's a death. It's the most beautiful

57:43death. This is you now being born into your true divine natural state of freedom, love, possibility, power, and pure creativity, which is all you've been doing. You You're just doing it unconsciously before. >> And the funny thing, I'm looking at this beautiful look at my page like of things that I wanted to ask. >> Yeah, it's all story. It all belongs to the little girl and we love her. But I would ceremonially, with all due respect, I would tear that page up. If you want to read it one more time, >> this is I'm looking and there is some this is something that I've been holding on for like forever. And I'm like, no, you have to ask about your dad. You have to ask about this. You have to ask about

58:25that. And I'm like, >> it's >> I don't give a damn. >> It's all garbage. With all due respect, it's all garbage. It's all old. So, I would invite you with your son to make it really powerful to let him know you're right. I was scared to be happy because I was just scared. It didn't matter. Fill in the blank. Scared to be wealthy, scared to be loved, scared to be sexy, scared to I was just scared. And you can show him whatever you want to show him, you know, the things you went through. And what a powerful ritual for him to see that everything that happened in mommy's past is done. Why? Cuz it's in my past. But I've been dragging it with me every day. And so whether you have a little fireplace

59:08there or somewhere where you could just burn that and and let go and step into this entirely new world of pure possibility with him. Sound good? >> You Peter, I know you hear this many times, but I say it from the bottom of my heart. It's just pure magic. >> Abracadabra as I speak. So I create. Now you get to be a magician in your own world. And I know every kid loves magic. So show your son some magic. As we speak, so we create. Speak some magic into your life. >> Deal. >> Deal. >> Welcome to 2.0. My my dear. This is >> I'm looking forward to looking I'm look looking back at that this podcast and I'm looking forward to seeing how what you did to me, you know, in a in a good way. You're like doom.

1:00:11>> Let's just say we did it together. I couldn't have had this conversation without you. I'd probably just >> We have done together breakfast. >> Yeah. Such a joy to be with you. you. I can see why you were the portal for such an extraordinary boy because you really are a gift and your nature is so playful. It's so fun and I really love that little girl who's been living in fear and thinking that you had to keep looking out for her. But she's fine. She's she's she's with you and there's nothing to worry about because there's nothing bad happens. There's just life happens and there's nothing that we can't handle. Sometimes it's not ideal. Okay, fine. But there's always an opportunity in it. >> Beyond thank you, Peter. Like I just I

1:01:00I'm so happy that I didn't put my hand up when I was in London because we probably wouldn't have enough time to >> Yeah. So, >> well, next time I'm in London or wherever I have a live event and you come along now, you're just going to be sitting there beaming with joy and whooping and aaring and screaming and not thinking there's anything wrong with you. and you'll be able to help me energetically to support the people who are still stuck in the 1.0 world when I speak to them and you'll be like, "Oh my god, they don't they don't get it. They're still looking through the lens of limitation, fear, and suffering." And that >> time I was like that. >> Yeah. And that's why we have compassion for each other. Everyone's doing the

1:01:41best they can within the limits of their current awareness. But boy am I ready to help people wake up to a new world. >> My god. and you do it so beautifully for me because I've been following your work I think since 2022. >> Mhm. >> You are such a genuine safe place. >> Thank you. That means a lot, >> you know. Oh, really? It's just and to come from me who never felt ever before safe. It's just >> Yeah. Thank you. >> Thank you so much. I just want to let you know, not only did your son just get a new mother, ironically, the one he's always known as there, but what's so beautiful is you get to amplify his possibility now, right? Because eventually it would have worn on him just like your mom through no fault

1:02:37of her own. >> Exactly. Exactly. That's the video. I guess I had that moment of like I don't know like my mind opened and I said I can't do that to him >> right >> like I'm responsible to take my crap and deal with it and let it go >> cuz Yeah. >> And listen listen I'm just going to just adjust it slightly. It's not crap. It's beautiful. It's part of the human condition. That that little girl being scared is not crap. It's totally appropriate. We love her. We want to We want to understand her reality because the integration is the removal of the suffering. It's okay. That was really scary. But you've been doing that to yourself for over three and a half decades, right? So, not only does your son today, as of today, it's official,

1:03:30he has a I can't wait to see what you guys create together with this new mom that he has. But what I wanted to acknowledge you for Amra is the courage that it takes for somebody with such a story of fear to spend time like this with me knowing that you know this is now going to probably touch the lives of millions of people who are in their own world of suffering but not anymore because of this conversation. So I just wanted to say thank you for the gift that your story is. Not only therefore is it not bad, what you've actually done through your ability, through your courage to go through war to cross enemy lines, in this case the enemy lines was your own imagination, but now you just gifted millions of people the opportunity to

1:04:17overcome their own war within. What a gift. >> I feel so blessed to be able to do that with you. It's unbelievable. >> Yeah. Thank you. Thank you for having the courage to go through what you went through so that you could through your own story help liberate other people to overcome their own version of war. Whatever it is that they went through. It might not have been an actual war. It might have been a household where the parents screamed. It might have been physical abuse. It might have been emotional abuse. God forbid sexual abuse. But they've been living in war for decades like you. And now they don't have to do that anymore. So, thank you for letting me hold space so that you could end the war and

1:05:00discover true peace, which is your nature, so that millions of other people around the world could do the same. And ultimately, as my podcast is called, find freedom. >> Thank you so much, Peter.